Monday, October 31, 2005

Eve of all Hallows, and Reformation Day

Today is the Latin feast of the Eve of All Hallows (or Hallowe'en). Today also is the anniversary of the posting of the 95 Theses of Martin Luther upon the Wittenburg Cathedral door, as Child of God has reminded me in a recent comment. While I have taken the liberty of deleting that comment (as it was off-topic), he has done a great service which should not be ignored, or forgotten. The full text of the 95 theses may be found here, and a summary of the import of those theses may be found here.

Friday, October 28, 2005

Why I became a Russian Catholic

In my early years of sojourning in the Roman Catholic Church, after I returned to Christ, at the age of 24, long ago, I noted marked differences between the ideals of that Church and their expressions in reality. While I cannot sufficiently enumerate those differences, two in particular come immediately to mind: The first is the radical differences between what was related in the Second Vatican Council and for two score years afterwards regarding liturgy, and the actual liturgical praxis in that Church for those last two score years; The second is the difference between the pivotal statement in the Vatican II Constitution on Divine Revelation, that the Holy Spirit has spoken to the Church through Scripture, Tradition, and the Teaching Authority of the Church, and the paucity of scripture, tradition and teaching authority to be found in the sermons or Divine Liturgies of most RC priests, the teachings of most RC bishops and cardinals, or the pronouncements of most RC ecclesial communities. I do not wish to cause dissention by this observation. I believe that I am simply stating the facts.

I found myself frustrated, and in fact angry, by this disparity. The anger, or frustration, was caused because I truly believed that this was the True Church, the center of Christ’s church, the Rock upon which even the gates of Hell would not prevail. And yet. . .

And yet I found no spiritual nourishment from it. After a futile year spent in the parish church of my youth, where (among many other things) the Monsignor there violated the express directive of Vatican II every liturgy by saying ‘The Lord is with you (instead of ‘The Lord be with you; turning a prayer into a prophesy, and from the extent of anger on my part which resulted from his disobedience, into a false prophesy), I chose to sing instead in a church which had a good choir, and which sang the range from Gregorian Chant to modern choral classics. It was good entertainment, and good singing, but I came to realize that what we were singing was just Sunday entertainment, not very far unlike Ralph Vaughan Williams’ starting a Sunday afternoon program of people singing and performing the choral masses of Franz Schubert at Oxford. In the main, the sermons there were of the pastor talking about his golf game. There was a crucial disjunct between prayer and performance.

Then one day, I happened to go into a bookstore, and find a cassette tape entitled ‘Russiche Kloster-Vesper”, on the label Koch-Schwann (which from my small stock of German I was able immediately to translate into “Russian Monastic Vespers”). I asked the store manager if he could play a few minutes of that tape. It was the most beautiful male a capella choral music I had ever heard. A couple of days later, I was able to raise the money necessary to buy that tape and take it home. I listened to it constantly, and began to translate the structure of the service in the liner notes from German into English. What I found could, with less difficulty, be found at this web address.

I began to realize that what was being sung was prayer, and the most beautiful prayer I had ever known. I was filled with it, and I asked God to send me to a place where I could pray like that. Within a month, I was led to St. Andrew Russian Catholic Church in El Segundo, California, in the very week that our pastor there, Fr. Alexei Smith, was being ordained for the service of the Divine Liturgy at St. Andrew’s.

I have been at St. Andrew’s ever since. There was a period of perhaps six months that I divided the time between St. Andrew’s and my old RC parish, St. Martin of Tours in Brentwood, but then came the Papal Masses of Los Angeles in 1987, and what happened there was the final straw in a long series of burdens which finally broke this camel’s back. I may recount it some day in this weblog, under the heading: “Why I am no longer a Roman Catholic”.

But I have found that it is more important to go to something that is good, rather than merely leave something because of the evils in it. I have gone to Russian Catholicism, and have remained in it for the past eighteen years, because in it, I have been nourished (through the services and the homilies of Fr. Alexei) in the saving truths and the true expressions of the Holy Spirit: Scripture, Tradition and the Councils. At the end of the Divine Liturgy of St. John Chrysostom, in the priest’s prayer before the Ambo, are the words: “Bless those who love the beauty of Thy house; glorify them in turn by Thy power, and forsake us not who put our trust in Thee.” In St. Andrew Church, I am greatly blessed by its beauty, glorified by God’s power, and upheld by the Lord in whom I trust.

What sparked this essay was a link from Benjamin of Occidentalis, who in turn linked to Huw Raphael of Doxos, who in turn linked to a wonderful web site of what I believe are public domain MP3s of a wide range of music, from classic gospel and bluegrass, to Persian and middle eastern music, to Western classical and romantic music, to Gregorian Chant. In that last section, in addition to recordings of monastic latin chant from the 30’s to the 50’s, there is also the great treasure of that recording which led me to the church that has fed me for the last score of years, by the Benedictine monks of the Eastern Catholic monastery of Chevetogne. Here it is. (Warning: it is a large file, of about 39 MB or so)

Enjoy.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Yet more dreadful nattering about the Order

I am heartened, and almost overwhelmed, with the positive response to my announcement of the Order of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. I believe that that response is largely responsible for my weblog's presently being elevated from the status of Squirming Reptile to that of Flapping Bird in the TTLB Ecosystem. How long and whether that will last, only God knows.

Nonetheless, I thank those who have either posted here, or at Fr. Kimel's Pontifications, regarding the Order. For those who are actually interested in all this, I have a bit more information:

1. I am given to understand that Fr. Kimel is now signing all of his documents as "Alvin Kimel, OHHGA". This heartens me beyond measure, and as the protomember of the Order, he certainly has the right to do so. If he, or future members of the Order wish, the Latin title for the Order is: Ordo Piraboli Manualis Sancti Antiochiensis or OPMSA. My thanks to this site for the finding of the neo-Latin term for "hand grenade". While from my small fund of Latin, it probably would have been a tad more correct to put the latin word for Antioch before the phrase for Holy Hand Grenade, I find the acronym for the Order is a tad more latinate just as it is, so it will probably remain that way.

2. At least one individual has asked how to become a member of the Order. As I am really impecunious at the moment, the temptation is to answer: bribery. I shall endeavor to resist that temptation. If, however, you find that I start putting up a wishlist on my weblog, or a PayPal account, little (or even big)purchases or contributions to these certainly could not hurt.

Seriously though, as I mentioned at its first announcement, the Order is to be bestowed on Latins and Westerners who have been particularly accurate or kind in presenting the Eastern Churches to the Western World. At present, I have at least three candidates for the Order in pectore, and I plan on announcing them on either a monthly or, at the very least, a fortnightly basis. The discerning will probably see from the examples I choose the desiderata which I employ in my selection.

The only other suggestion that I have is if one feels that one is worthy of the Order, one bring himself or herself to my attention: I can't bestow the award if I don't know who you are, or what you are doing. And certainly, if you are not given to shameless self-promotion, it would not hurt to bring other worthies to my attention. In the process, I will of course look at your own writings, and consider them as well.

Finally, linking to my weblog is a sure-fire way of bringing yourself to my attention. I will of course do the same for any who do me this courtesy, but it is not necessary. For example, the worthy Fr. Kimel does not link my weblog to his site, but in looking at those to whom he links, it is probably because he only links to good weblogs. A pity, though.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Order of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch

I note with pleasure that Edward Yong (aka Sprezzatura) is still among the living and the weblogging. I also note that he has recently instituted the “Cardinal Humbert Prize” for Latins who say particularly silly and ignorant things about the Eastern Churches. I’m sure that he will find plenty of more than qualified candidates, and will have a great deal of fun in doing so. I am looking forward to viewing more of these prizes, and reading the manner in which Edward lambastes the recipients of his “awards”.

I, however, proceed on the principle that one can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, but even more with ordure (although why one would wish to catch flies in the first place is beyond me). Regardless, on that principle, I have decided to institute the Order of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, and to bestow this honor on Latins and Westerners who have been particularly accurate or kind in presenting the Eastern Churches to the Western World.

I’m afraid that because of my impecunious state, I can neither send the Holy Hand Grenade to members of the Order, nor can I be present when it is awarded. I have taken the liberty of preparing the Rite for Investiture of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch for members of the Order, and I publish it here for their use, and the public’s edification. For those who are members of the Order, and who wish to complete the Rite, they can purchase the Holy Hand Grenade here and administer the rite themselves (or with a group of sympathetic or not-so-sympathetic friends).

And, for the first member of the Order, I can think of no one more deserving than Fr. Al Kimel, and his weblog, Pontifications, whose entries in that regard have accurately and often kindly presented the Eastern Churches to the Western and the modern worlds. To Fr. Kimel, then, my congratulations (or if he prefers, my condolences).

Rite for the Investiture of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch (With most profound apologies to both Monty Python and the faithful).

Entrance Hymn: “All Things Dull and Ugly”


Litany between Minister and Congregation

The First Lesson from the Book of Anonymous (An.13.13-17)

People: Thanks be unto God.

The Second Lesson from the Book of Armaments (Arm.2.9-21):

People: Thanks be unto God.

And then, leaving off all coarse jesting, let some worthy Priest or Deacon or other Minister read the following prayer of Investiture.

O Lord, Jesus Christ, the True Light from the East, the Dayspring from on high, the Giver of good things, Who through Thy Transfiguration on Mount Tabor didst reveal to Thine Apostles, Peter, John, and James, in the presence of Thy Prophets Moses and Elias, Thy Glory and Power, and who art the Hope of the hopeless, the Help of the helpless, and the Salvation of our souls: Bless this orb and those to whom it is entrusted, to Thy glory and in honor of Thy saints, St. Theodore the Recruit and St. Andrew, The Fool for Christ.

Grant, O Good One, unto those to whom this orb is entrusted, all Thine earthly and Heavenly good things. Gladden them in joy with Thy countenance, and show them the paths to salvation. Be swift to fulfill the requests of their hearts and their every wish, guiding them to the doing of Thy commandments, that in gladness and rejoicing they may forever hymn and glorify Thy most honorable and majestic Name, by the intercessions of the Most blessed Mary, Ever virgin and Mother of our God, of the holy, glorious St. Theodore the Recruit and St. Andrew, The Fool for Christ, and of all Thy Saints. Amen.

Then let the coarse jesting resume.

Closing Hymn: “O Lord, please don’t burn us”

Sunday, October 23, 2005

And now, from the sublime. . .

This courtesy of my dear friend, Karen Thompson:

FOUR RELIGIOUS TRUTHS

1. Muslims do not recognize Jews as God's chosen people.

2. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.

3. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian World.

4. Baptists do not recognize each other at Hooters.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

"And that's another fine Mass you've gotten me into"

Both AAE and Dad29 have been singing the praises of Romy, and in particular, this entry of hers. I am happy to join the choir. Do please read her weblog, if you have not already started: It (and she) are graced with beautiful prose, a fund of knowledge, and a perspective worth sharing. Enjoy.

Friday, October 21, 2005

An old friend, and a new one

Until recently, the way that I did my weblog reading was to click on Rex Olendi, Rex Cledendi, and hit his links buttons. That worked pretty well for a time. Unfortunately, Paul Rex has not been doing much posting lately, which is a great pity; he has both written and linked to interesting things. Nonetheless, now that I've grown to a man's estate (or more to the point, have figured out how to diddle with my weblog template and am learning to read html protocols), I have my own links page. Don't worry, though: as the reader may see, I still have Paul's weblog linked.

That said, I must say that the metaphor of the internet as a World Wide Web is a very accurate one: one starts with one page, starts traveling down the links which it provides, which lead to yet further links, with more information and people, and. . . Sometimes one can get lost in all the reticulation. Or trapped, like poor Frodo in Shelob's web.

But returning to the metaphor of the Web, sometimes one finds treasures down the next strand. One such is Pontifications. This has been and is a wonderful commonplace book, filled with quotations from Anglican divines, The Latin and Greek church fathers, and modern Protestant, Roman Catholic and Orthodox theologians. Sometimes the web author, Fr. Al Kimel (formerly of the Episcopal Church), will open his own thoughts to the reader, and they are as good as just about anything he quotes. When one combines this with the hundreds of comments that each entry seems to have, just about all of them as thoughtful and well-informed as Fr. Kimel is, one is almost overwhelmed with the feast of faith and reason displayed there.

I looked recently at my links list, and found that Pontifications was not on it. Foolish me! However, one can see that that omission has been corrected. I do not think that I can more highly recommend a web page than this one.

Another web page, which is perhaps as loaded with interesting entries as Pontifications, is Bearing Blog. Its author, a PhD in Engineering and the mother of two homeschooled children, has a perspective, a broad and deep knowledge of many subjects (literary, historical, scientific and mathematical), and a pellucid and humorous writing style that must be seen to be believed. I must thank DarwinCatholic for linking to it. I am doing the same myself.

To quote the last line of the motion picture, (and as regards these two most worthy webpages) Casablanca, this looks like the beginning of a beautiful friendship. And the continuation of an old one.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Another reason why I link to www.jerrypournelle.com

This will probably offend Cacciaguida, The Young Fogey, and DarwinCatholic, but possibly not Dad29. But, unlike liberal Episcopalians, they can take both a joke, and a point.

How can you tell if a conservative is pro- or anti-Miers? Based on my conversations with conservative friends this week, here's a good rule of thumb. Ask the conservative to define the following words or phrases and see what he says.

"Blackberry"

Anti-Miers: A handheld device that allows you to get e-mail and access the Internet. The biggest problem is when the battery runs low. You solve the problem by carrying a charger.

Pro-Miers: A delicious berry that you find in the woods. The biggest problem is that bears love them too. You solve that problem by carrying a .44 Magnum.

"Friends"

Anti-Miers: A popular TV show that looked at cultural and sexual mores.

Pro-Miers: People you invite over to your house

"$20 Snifter of Cognac"

Anti-Miers: Not a bad price for a great brandy at a nice bar.

Pro-Miers: An outrageous price for a drink. Where we people live, you can get a two-pound T-bone steak dinner and a drink for $20.

"Meet the Press"

Anti-Miers: Must-see TV.

Pro-Miers: We are too busy going to church. Besides, who really cares what they say?

"December"

Anti-Miers: A period of increased cultural sensitivity when you have to wish people a "Happy Holiday" instead of "Merry Christmas" for fear of offending them.

Pro-Miers: Merry Christmas!

"A List"

Anti-Miers: The type of party you want to be invited to.

Pro-Miers: What you don't want to get from your wife on Saturday morning.

"Assault Weapons"

Anti-Miers: A class of weapons that anti-Miers conservatives use in their legal arguments concerning the meaning and extent of the Second Amendment. Although anti Miers conservatives favor the ownership of assault weapons, they probably have never touched or fired one.

Pro-Miers: A nice varmint gun, although it doesn't have enough range or accuracy to shoot wary prairie dogs. They aren't as good as Dad's old M1 Garand.

"Democracy"

Anti-Miers: A Broadway play.

Pro-Miers: One of the things that makes America great.

"Antonin Scalia"

Anti-Miers: A brilliant legal scholar with libertarian tendencies. A good Supreme Court justice.

Pro-Miers: Who? Oh, the guy who hunts with the vice president and belongs to a gun club in Virginia. A good Supreme Court justice.

"The Buzz"

Anti-Miers: What "everybody who is anybody" is talking about.

Pro-Miers: What hornets, bees, wasps and yellow jackets do.

"Hunting"

Anti-Miers: A method for thinning wildlife populations that allows a rural American tradition to continue.

Pro-Miers: A chance to get together with some friends on a weekend and have a good time. We never let the hunting get in the way of having fun, however.

"Cowboy"

Anti-Miers: A metaphor for the American tendency to act aggressively. What makes America a great power.

Pro-Miers: The guy we see at the diner, who works on a ranch or travels the rodeo circuit. A term that is rarely applied, and when it is, is a compliment.

"John Deere"

Anti-Miers: A riding lawn mower.

Pro-Miers: A tractor.

"Paris Hilton"

Anti-Miers: A cultural icon.

Pro-Miers: A hotel in France. Although I wouldn't know, because why would I want to go to Paris on vacation when I can go camping?

"Big Bore"

Anti-Miers: A person who corners you at an A List cocktail party.

Pro-Miers: A rifle that you need for hunting elephant or cape buffalo.

Saturday, October 15, 2005

A reminder of why I link Jerry Pournelle

If you will look at my "links" page, you will note that I link www.jerrypournelle.com,

If you (or even I) had wonders why, they should be eliminated by this one posting, and Dr. Pournelle's response:

"When you hear hoofbeats think horses not zebras"

C Stillings

But sometimes they are unicorns.
J. Pournelle


Quod erat demonstrandum.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Hiding the Victim

These days, I generally like the writings of Todd from Catholic Sensibilities. While I often do not agree with him, I have been finding that he has endeavored at least to be thoughtful in his position. However, I find that when he tries to defend the status quo as regards modern Roman Catholic liturgical praxis, he tends to lose his otherwise admirable sensibility and thoughtfulness.

A case in point is a recent entry of his, entitled: "Why Can't I Find Jesus", regarding the apparent tendency of modern Roman Catholic liturgists to place the tabernacle (or the place in which the Eucharist is reserved) in places that cannot easily be found by the faithful. Todd’s response to the question is as follows:

To which I might reply, "Because you didn't look for him."

Sorry, Todd, but that dog just won’t hunt. Translating that from southern vernacular into standard English: in this instance, your comment is beside the point. To give but one example: it took me three visits to the Roman Catholic Cathedral of Los Angeles, Our Lady of The Angels, before I was able to find that the Eucharist was in fact reserved, let alone where it was.

The first time, I was impressed (not favorably) by the fact that the interior was bare grey concrete. I was also impressed by the fact that, although it was one of those rare clear blue days in L.A. outside, due to the lighting, it was perpetual june gloom inside (like daylight in the movies A Nightmare Before Christmas or The Addams Family). I looked distantly to the front of the church (as there was nothing to distinguish it from the rest of that great hall, I could not call it a sanctuary). I saw the big bishop’s chair (so at least the place could with accuracy be called a cathedral) and the even bigger table (at least sixteen feet on a side) apparently topped with illuminated glass, more like God’s coffee table in that great living room than like a table of the Lord. There was no crucifix, or other Christological representation in the sanctuary. It looked like a place in which Our Lord had not been invited.

I searched everywhere for any indication that the Body and Blood of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ might be somehow present, including the mausoleum beneath the nave. It had endless rows of blank faux marble, though the material when I touched it felt harder than steel. If I were going to make a good motion picture of A Wrinkle in Time, and if I were going to make a visual representation of Central Central Intelligence on the planet Kamazotz, I’d film it in the Cathedral’s mausoleum.

I went back up to the nave, briefly admired the tapestries on the north and south walls, and looked again at the structure. It looked as though someone was trying to make a building that would have the same function as Union Station, but who had failed to capture that Station’s noble qualities. I looked at the concrete walls, with their patterned holes in those walls, and suddenly realized that it was the same building pattern used by L.A. Metro, the (so-called) rapid transit authority which mismanages the bus and train lines here. To complete the Metro analogy, at the east wall of the Cathedral was, not an icon of Our Lady, or a grand mosaic of Our Lord, the Creator of all (or Pantocrator), but instead a hazy image of a map of the Los Angeles Archdiocese, exactly like the sort of map of L.A. that would be found in any Metro terminal.

I finally saw a dim light at the east wall of the Cathedral which looked as though it might be a sanctuary light. I decided to overcome my tendency of not lightly walking in any sanctuary, and went to the front of the Cathedral to see what that light was. I finally saw that it was a standard official “Exit” light. Taking that for a sign, I decided to leave the building and return to the nearby Law Library to continue my work for that day.

The next time I visited the Cathedral, during great Lent of this last year, I decided to pay more attention to the tapestries. They were images of the saints, in almost photographic detail. The apostles were scattered among them, and everyone from St. John Chrysostom to the Venerable Bede to Mother Teresa. All were appropriately dressed and coiffed (with the two exceptions of Moses the Ethiopian [with dreadlocks], and St. Nicholas of Myra [dressed like a mediaeval Roman Bishop, instead of the patristic Greek Bishop which he was]. All were looking forward toward the so-called sanctuary. But I noticed that this time, there was a life-sized crucifix of dark wood between the Cardinal’s chair and the great coffee table, with a life-sized corpus upon the cross, carved and painted in Latin American style. I felt much better, although I still could not find any indication that our Lord Christ might be present in any other way.

As a side note, I was told by Fr. Alexei, my parish priest, and a senior official in the Archdiocese, that the crucifix had been placed there during that Lent for the benefit of those asking for it, and had been adopted by the Latino community as their own, and so it was not removed after Pascha. Whatever the reason, I was at least glad that for this great continuing Wedding party, someone had decided to remember the Founder of the Feast.

The third time that I visited the Cathedral, I spent a few minutes looking at the exhibits inside the south wall of the building. I happened to find a small sign, about 8” x 8”, which read, “Blessed Sacrament Chapel”. I followed the sign, and finally found the tabernacle. Or something resembling it.

What I found was a small room, built like a niche into one of the side entrances into the Cathedral nave. It had a small glass door, which had words etched in it saying that all were to remain silent. Perhaps twenty or thirty people could stand inside, and there were a small number of kneelers (I believe that they are also called prei-dieux, or something like that). There was something like a small, misshapen, bronze sarcophagus at the front of the “chapel”, in which I suppose the Blessed Body and Blood had been reserved. This thing would not have been at all out of place in the final “wedding” scene in the movie Beetlejuice. Many people were praying there, and the overwhelming feeling that I got there was sadness. I too prayed for a time, and then left.

As an aside, and as an eastern Catholic, I do not understand the apparent need of Westerners to have to see the Eucharist in order to adore it. We in the East think it far more important to consume the Sacred Body and Blood, and to consider it to be our Food and our Medicine of Immortality. Also, because its earthly form is leavened bread and unpreserved red wine, its form does not keep all that long.

Nonetheless, our Churches reserve some of the Sacred Body and Blood, not to adore it, but for the benefit of the sick and the suffering for whom our priests and deacons take the Eucharist to them, for their healing, their health, and their salvation. We also reserve the Eucharist during Great and Holy Lent for the Liturgy of the Presanctified Gifts, which we do because a canon of the early Church (once respected by both the East and the West) forbids us to confect the Eucharist during weekdays of Great Lent. Perhaps modern RC liturgists thought that by removing the tabernacle from the central visual focus of a church, they would be more in line with Eastern liturgical practice.

If so, they are mistaken. While we do not visually adore the reserved Eucharist, we honor it in the best way that we can. In the center of the sanctuaries of our churches, guarded and shielded by the iconostasis, is the altar, shaped in the form of a cube, as a type of the altar of sacrifice of the old Temple of Solomon. On the right front corner of that altar is placed the Book of the Gospels, to honor the presence of Christ the Word. But in the center of the altar, placed within a small wooden structure made to resemble that of the exterior of our churches, is reserved the Sacred Body and Blood, in the true center of our Church.

So, no, Todd, I do not think it is appropriate for you to blame those who cannot find the Eucharist in these new “churches” of yours. I think that it is the case that you are merely blaming the victim. But I think that your fault is far less than those modern RC liturgists, who seem intent on hiding the Victim.

Sunday, October 09, 2005

On Reading Music

I had to go down to the County Law Library to do some legal research last week, and I also had to take my wife to our friend’s house so she could do work on the gardens there. So I left my car and my wife at our friend’s, walked a mile or so to Wilshire and Western, took the Metro train to the Civic Center station, and walked about a block to the law library. Believe me, the Metro fare ($3.00 for a day pass) was cheaper than the combination of gas money, parking ($6.00 to $12.00 per day), and irritation value of trying to drive in downtown Los Angeles traffic. Besides, I had twenty minutes each way to read. I brought with me the Curwen score of Ralph Vaughan Williams’ Mass in G Minor, which in my opinion is the most beautiful setting of the Latin Mass that I have ever heard.

As an experiment, I decided to see how much of it I could read. In the twenty minutes or so on the Metro going downtown, I read through the bass and tenor lines of the Kyrie, well enough so that I could hear each of these lines in my head. On the way back, I read through the remaining (alto and soprano) lines of the Kyrie, again well enough to hear each line clearly. I figure that if I were to put another hour or so into it, I could memorize the entire Kyrie, all of its lines, and have it by heart well enough to be able to conduct it, or to teach it, or even to sing it.

I wasn’t always like this. When I started singing in adult church choirs, at the age of 24, I learned any music by the usual way for most singers: I’d listen to it as the organist or pianist would play out each part. Gradually, I got to the place where I could pick out individual lines upon hearing the whole piece played, and I was always good at memorizing music.

When I came to St. Andrew Russian Catholic Church, however, the choir director there, the late Dr. Frank Ryan, finding that I could sing bass or tenor, was in the habit of switching me from part to part to fill in where a section lacked strength. In the course of a Divine Liturgy, I’d probably sing each of all four parts. Because I had the funny idea that one should pray the Liturgy and not just sing it, I therefore got into the habit of memorizing all of the lines of a choral piece. I also started looking at the books, and saw the wealth of beautiful music that remained unsung, because we did not know it. So I started teaching myself how to read music, both individual lines and entire choral pieces. And strangely enough, a year after Dr. Ryan’s untimely and unfortunate death, I was asked to direct the choir. For the last twelve years, I’ve either been the main or the assistant choir director at St. Andrew’s (three times, I’ve stepped aside when there was someone I thought more qualified to be available; two of those times I found myself to be mistaken (sigh)). Fortunately, we have a much better choir director than me now: Gabriel Meyer, a graduate of the New England Conservatory of Music, a superlative director and composer, and an all-around neat guy.

In retrospect, I suppose that I received an excellent apprenticeship in choral singing and conducting. I also suppose that it helped that in addition to my years of singing in good Episcopal, Anglican, and Roman Catholic choirs, I was fortunate enough to be involved in a master chorale for a fair number of years, and have read through and sung much of the standard choral repertoire.

Nonetheless, I’ve noticed that most people, including those who have supposedly gotten a musical education, are still poor sight readers, or are even musically illiterate. I have thought this a great pity, as I have found that learning to read music is a very simple thing to do. Anyone who has access to the internet, or who can spend less than twenty dollars, can learn to read music in less than a month. Anyone who is willing in addition to buy two or three books, and to read through them, can learn how to read well enough to become a member of a professional choral group in six months to a year (assuming of course that one can sing, but as I have mentioned before, that is also an easy thing to learn).

Actually, just about everything that I learned about reading music is in Plato’s Republic. As I recall, in the third or so book of that dialogue, Plato had Socrates say that in order to learn a song, first you learn the words, then you learn the rhythm of the song, and then finally you learn the melody of the song. Basically, in learning to read vocal music, you need to break things down into these component parts, gain skill in learning each of the parts, and then put things back together again.

Reading words. It is a great pity to have to say this, but our present educational system appears to have done a poor job in teaching children how to read English, and how to read other languages. As regards English, for a good number of years teachers had taught that it was more important to learn what a whole word looked like, than to be able to know the individual letters and to spell or sound out a word. This appears to have been a classic case of putting the cart before the horse. We have since learned that our capacity to recognize whole words comes from the antecedent ability to spell or sound out the individual letters, and then find the gestalt of the word from that spelling. The result has been several generations of illiterate or semiliterate “graduates” of grade and high schools. Perhaps the less said about attempts to teach foreign languages in this country, the better.

Again, Plato, in his Republic said and taught it better: in order to learn how to read well, one must recognize individual letters and their combinations until they become automatic. While I assume that anyone who can read my weblog is literate in English, I do not assume the same about literacy in other languages. Thus, in order to sing languages with a latin alphabet (such as Latin, French, Spanish, Italian, German, etc.), it is necessary to know what the vowels sound like, what vowel combinations or diphthongs sound like, what consonants sound like, and what consonant combinations sound like. Similarly, with languages with non-latin alphabets (such as Greek, Russian, Slavonic, etc.), I have found that it is useful to first learn the vowels, then diphthongs, then start combining them with consonants, and then recognizing the sounds that combinations of consonants make.

Translating this into a practical example, if one is reading sheet music in English, read through the words first. If one is reading sheet music in another language with which one is unfamiliar, get an alphabet guide (a page in most grammars in which one can see the sounds of the alphabet). Then scan through the text of the song and sound out the vowels in it; then go back and sound out any diphthongs; then sound out the consonant and vowel combinations, then the consonant combinations. Then slowly sound out the words until one can read them aloud without stumbling over them. In the course of my church and professional choral singing, I have sung in perhaps twenty different languages (less than half of which I can actually read). I have found this method of learning texts to have been more than worth the effort.

Rhythm When one can read the words easily, the next step is to read the rhythm of the music. To do this, you will first have to recognize such things as the staff, the notes (whole note=bird’s egg=four beats; half note=bird’s egg with line=two beats; quarter note=dot with line=one beat; eighth note=dot with line and one flag= half beat; sixteenth note=dot with line and two flags= quarter beat) rests (same durations as above, but I’m not going to describe them), ties, dotted notes, and meter. All this information can be found in the first seven lessons of www.musictheory.net. The lessons are very short, so even someone wanting to take their time could easily get through them within a week. Of course, if you want to take longer, that’s no problem. You have all the time in the world. The most important thing to recognize about all this stuff is that it is the alphabet of rhythm. How to read the rhythm I explain below.

There are two fundamental skills that you need learn in order to read rhythm: how to beat and how to count. Basically, you learn to beat by tapping your finger or your toe to a constant beat. Listening to the ticking of an old fashioned watch or clock or metronome is one way, feeling one’s heart beat is another, one’s pace while walking is another, saying da-da-da or its equivalent is yet another. While you are reading the lessons on www.musictheory.net , get into the habit of keeping a regular beat, in any way that you can without bringing attention to yourself, until it becomes habitual and comfortable.

When you can keep a beat, the next step is to count to it. First, count to two. This means keeping a beat, and counting (first aloud, later silently) one-two-one-two-one-two. . When one is comfortable with this, try counting in three: one-two-three-one-two-three-one-two-three. . . When one can count in three habitually (aloud and silently), then try counting in four: one-two-three-four-one-two-three-four. . . until this too becomes habitual, both aloud and silently.

When one can count habitually in two, three, and four, then you can start to halve (or divide in half) the beat. This means keeping the same beat, but adding a beat within it: for counting in two, it would be one-and-two-and-one-and-two-and. . . For counting in three, it would be one-and-two-and-three-and-one-and-two-and-three-and. . .For counting in four, it would be one-and-two-and-three-and-four-and. . . All this gives one facility in counting eighth notes.

Finally, when one can habitually halve a beat, one can learn to quarter the beat. This means keeping the same beat, but halving it again. For counting in two, it would mean saying (first aloud, then silently): one-ee-and-a-two-ee-and-a-one-ee-and-a-two-ee. . . until it becomes habitual. For counting in three, it means doing the same for one-ee-and-a-two-ee-and-a-three-ee-and-a. . . For counting in four, it means doing the same for one-ee-and-a-two-ee-and-a-three-ee-and-a-four-ee-and-a. . . All this gives one facility in counting sixteenth notes.

Once one is able habitually and silently to keep a beat, to count in two, three and four, to halve the beat, and to quarter the beat, one has developed most of the skills necessary to read the rhythm of the overwhelming majority of vocal music scores. Most scores are written in either 2/4 (counting in two), 3/4 (counting in three) or 4/4 (counting in 4, also called C for “common time”). All other meters can be read by examining the top number of the fraction (which gives the number of beats per measure), and the bottom number of the fraction (which gives the duration of the beat). Thus, for example, the meter 3/2 gives three beats, where each beat is a half note; the meter 5/4 gives a meter of five beats per measure, with each beat being a quarter note; the meter 7/8 gives a meter of seven beats, with each beat being an eighth note. On those occasions where the music does not have a meter (that is, where it does not have a fraction in the score), one simply treats the notes as a succession of beats, and one reads the rhythm with a constant beat or pulse.

The final skills that are necessary for reading rhythm are, once one has found the meter or meters of a score, to habitually count the notes or rests in the appropriate way: a whole note with four beats, a dotted half note with three beats, a half note with two beats, a quarter note with one beat, an eighth note with a halved beat, and a sixteenth note with a quartered beat, and to do the same with the appropriate rests, dots, and ties.

When one can beat, count, decipher meter, and correctly count notes, rests, dots and ties, one has all the skills necessary to read rhythm in music. One gains skill in reading the rhythm of scores by reading a large number of scores. I would suggest finding sheet music that one likes on the internet and reading that. For those who are Roman Catholic, perhaps the only benefit of such hymnbooks as Ritualsong and Worship and Praise, or the hymns in most GIA or OCP missalettes, is that they are sufficiently simple rhythmically to be read easily. And if one’s homilist is down to the standard of most Roman Catholic priests, (i.e. unable to preach his way out of a paper bag), one can devote the homily towards something useful instead, such as reading the words of a hymn or two, and then reading the rhythm of those hymns. (Of course, if your parish is graced with good hymnals, choirs, and homilists, rhythm reading at the homily would be an inappropriate use of time. Try getting to church five or ten minutes before liturgy starts, finding out what hymns are going to be sung, and reading the words and rhythms then instead).

When one has read through the words of a score, and has separately read the rhythm alone of the score, one is ready to read the words in the rhythm indicated by the score. After some period of time in reading, one will find that it is a simple matter to read the words and the rhythm at the same time. Take your time, though, and don’t rush; you’ll get there eventually.

Melody Reading This is where you will need to buy some equipment. Fortunately, for most people, all you will need will be a chromatic pitch wheel ($8 to $10) and a tuning fork ($7-$10), each in C. If you have access to a piano or an electronic keyboard of good quality, so much the better, but neither are essential. Do not buy one of those ten to twenty dollar toy keyboards; most often they are not in tune. The advantage of the wheel and tuning fork are that they can be kept in a trouser pocket or purse, and carried around just about anywhere.

Now, when you are able to blow a note on the pitch wheel, find the low C and blow it until you are able to hear the note on it. Don’t blow too hard: if you do, it may damage the reeds or vibrators in the wheel. The wheel should have the letters of the scale and a representation of the note’s place on the treble clef (more on that later). Then find the D on the pitch wheel and blow that. Listen to the sound and pitch that it makes. Do the same with the E, F, G, A, B and high C on the wheel. When you are comfortable with doing so, blow each note of these eight pitches in turn C, D, E, F, G, A, B, C. This is called the scale in C major, by the way, but you really don’t need to know that right now.

What you do need to do is this: blow the C on the pitch wheel, and then attempt to match the sound of the pitch wheel with your voice. Alternate between blowing the note and singing the note. This is an important musical skill called “matching pitches” or “tuning’, which you need to develop before you can sing in tune. Most people who think they are tone deaf (with the exception of the very, very few with genuine auditory nerve damage, perhaps one in ten thousand), are simply those who have failed to develop this skill.

As a side note, if you try this and have real difficulty hearing or matching pitches, I suggest that you may want to invest a few more dollars (between 20 and 40) in purchasing a small chromatic tuner. I like the Yamaha because it has lights that light up for each pitch, with a little side bar which shows how far under or over the pitch you are. Use the Yamaha by first blowing the note on the pitch wheel near enough to the Yamaha so that it can pick up the pitch and display it on the Yamaha. Then use your voice to get the Yamaha to light the same pitch. This adds a certain amount of feedback.

When you are able to match the C, do the same with the D, and so on until you feel you are able to match all the notes in the scale. Then try singing up and down the scale until you can hit each note clearly. Use the pitch wheel occasionally to test how well you are singing the pitches. When you are comfortable with singing this scale, use the tuning fork (remember the tuning fork?) to find the low C of the scale. To use the tuning fork, you hold the stem firmly between the thumb and forefinger of your dominant hand, then you strike the tines against the base knuckle or fleshy part of the thumb of your other hand, then quickly hold the tines of the fork near your ear to hear the tone. If you strike it too softly, you won’t be able to hear the fork; if you strike it too hard, you’ll hurt your hand. If you try striking it against just about any other hard surface (like wood or metal, etc.), you’ll just damage the fork.

When you can use the tuning fork to find the low C, and can sing the scale up and down, Then sing the scale up and down, using these words:

C - Do
D - Re
E - Mi
F - Fa
G - Sol
A - La
B - Ti
C - Do

Do this until it becomes a part of you.

This is called the major scale, and is the basis for about half of all songs sung in most of Western music. Most of the rest is comprised of the minor scale. Try singing a scale down, and go past the “Do” to “Ti” and then “La”. Sing the scale from “La” to “La”. That’s the minor scale. (Of course, over the years Western musicians have “tweaked” the minor scale in at least two different variants, but this will work for right now.)

There is one last skill that you need to develop before you can read music, and that is building a scale. If you have done the exercises above, you should be able to sing a major scale (in C) and a minor scale (in A). Try the following exercise: pick a pitch which you can sing with comfort. Call that “Do”. Then sing a major scale on that pitch. When you can sing that comfortably, pick another pitch. Call that “La”. Sing a minor scale with that pitch as the beginning. Continue these until you can find just about any note, and can sing a major or a minor scale from them.

When you are able to do these things, you have all the skills necessary to read the melody of music. Of course, there are also some things that you also have to know. For this, I suggest you review the first seven lessons of www.musictheory.net, and then read the next five lessons.

What you first need to know is the pitches for the treble (or G) clef (you know, the one that has the squiggle that looks like a cursive G on steroids or hallucinogens), and the bass (or F) clef (the one with the curved line and two dots). Each of them has five lines and four spaces. The pitches for the five lines of the treble clef (from bottom to top) are E-G-B-D-F (the sexist mnemonic for this is Every Good Boy Does Fine). The pitches for the spaces (again from bottom to top) are F-A-C-E, as in, “the mnemonic for this one is staring you in your _____”. Likewise, the pitches for the five lines of the bass clef are (again from bottom to top) G-B-D-F-A (Good Boys Deserve Failure Always), and the pitches for the spaces for the bass clef (yet again, from bottom to top) are A-C-E-F. The student is invited to make a mnemonic for this last one, or for any of the others with which he or she is dissatisfied. Just don’t tell me what they are.

When you have gotten to the point where you can tell the name for any pitch on the bass or treble clef, you’re ready to learn the final valuable lesson: Where’s Do?” Basically, you have three choices.

1) If there is nothing on the left side of the staff other than a time signature, then “Do” is anywhere there is a C. Usually, however, there is a pattern of funny little symbols, either cross-hatches (musically literate people call them “sharps”) or things that look like the lower case letter “b” (musicians call these “flats”).

2) Sharps. If there are one or more sharps on the left side of the staff, look where the last sharp (reading from left to right) is on the staff. That will always be the “Ti” of the scale. The next space or line above the sharp will be the Do.

3) Flats. If there is only one flat on the staff, it will be on the “Fa” of the scale. If you sing from “Fa” four notes down, you will find the “Do” there. If there are two or more flats on the staff, it’s even simpler to find “Do”: The last flat of the pattern (reading left to right) will always the “Fa” of the scale. The second to last flat will always be the “Do”.

Once you have found the line or space where the “Do” is, then you’re ready to start reading the melody. You can do this in two ways:

1) You can pick a pitch at random that is comfortably within your range, use that pitch as the “Do” of the scale you are supposed to be singing, build a scale from that “Do”, and then sing the notes written on the staff from the reference point of that “Do”. This is an easy way of getting the “shape” of the melody, especially when you want to read something, but have left your pitch wheel or tuning fork at home. Getting skill in singing this way is also important if you want to sing together with other people (especially chorally), and for one reason or another, they have started with a pitch different from the one it is written in.

2) If you want to be pedantic, you can read the note to find the place on the staff where the “Do” begins, use your pitch pipe to sound out that note, build a scale from it, and then sing from that “Do”. Developing skill in singing this way has the advantage that it will better enable you to sing with musicians who are playing in the actual key that something is written in.

For those who are interested, this method of reading is called the “Flexible Do” system. There is another method of reading called the “Fixed Do” system, and I may discuss it in another essay. I think there are two final points worth mentioning before we close on this topic:

1) It will often happen that the melody does not begin on “Do”. What you need to do first is to find “Do”, and then sing either up or down until you find the note that begins the melody. Then go from there.

2) Most post mediaeval melodies involve not just movements from step to step on a scale, but also involve jumps of several steps. These “jumps” are called “intervals”. When you are first learning how to read, the best way to handle these jumps or intervals is to first sound out the steps, then attempt to sound out the interval. An example of that would be if there were a jump from “Do” to “Fa”. First sing Do-Re-Me-Fa, and then try singing Do-Fa. Gradually, with practice and with some reading, these intervals will become easy to negotiate, and reading melodies by sight will become easy and almost automatic.

To sum up then, in order to read music, it is best to break the process down into its component parts. First, read the words of a musical text. Then read the rhythm of the musical text. Then read through the melody. Then put the words to the rhythm, and finally the rhythmical speaking of the words to the melody. Gradually, if you continue to read on a regular basis, you will find that you do not have to break things down, and that you can read the words, the rhythm, and the melody at once. You may even find that with practice, you will be able to hear the music in your mind’s ear as you read through it.

POSTSCRIPT: I have found two books in particular that have helped me to go on from simply being able to read to developing good musicianship. The first is a graded reader of musical melodies and rhythms called Melodia. I recommend it to anyone wishing to develop ability in sight reading. The second is Solfege, Ear Training, Rhythm, Dictation, and Music Theory, by Marta Ghezzo. This book involves a systematic training in movable and fixed Do solfege, all major and minor scales, the mediaeval and contemporary modes, dynamic markings and musical terminology, intervals and chord reading, and even in the atonal, serial and aleatory music of the 20th century. Anyone who is willing to read through these books, and to learn what they have to say, will be more than a match for any mediaeval, classical, romantic, modern, or post modern Western music that is thrown their way.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Links! At Last!

Through the kindness of Dad29, who has shown me how to tweak the template of my weblog, I now have links. As per the previous post, I am now in the process of putting together links to webpages I am interested in, and in friends who have been kind enough to link to my weblog.

One warning, however: The links which I have listed as GUILTY PLEASURES are definitely funny, but also definitely PG: I would not let little children see these, if I were you.

Monday, October 03, 2005

Regards to comrades and friends

I have recently learned that my weblog has achieved the rank of Slithering Reptile in TTLB ecosystem. I have also learned that the way to achieve a more elevated rank is to increase the number of times that one's weblog is cited in other peoples' weblogs.

As the Gospel Reading for my church this Sunday had the counsel from Our Lord to do that to others which one would wish to have done to one's self, it should be only reasonable that I start citing weblogs that I read and believe should be further promulgated.

So I will start with two weblogs of friends. The first is occidentalis.blogspot.com. The author of this weblog is doing the needful task of showing that a Western Rite Orthodoxy is an important thing to preserve and cultivate, not only in that it is important to save all that is good in Anglicanism from the shipwreck in the late Anglican Communion which is even now occuring, but that there is much in Western Christendom which could profitably be observed and even learned by the East. While this is not my primary task, as I feel that there is also much in the East that may be profitably be learned and adopted by the West, I can only salute another laborer in the field. May his writings and his work long continue!

The second is darwincatholic.blogspot.com. This is a weblog written by two friends of mine: Darwin and Mrsdarwin: obvious pseudonyms for two dear friends who are in fact the son and daugher-in-law of two dear and old friends. (and burning coals could not force from me their names, at least as long as they wish to remain anonymous). While this is more an RC writing, both Darwin and his spouse display an intelligence, a wit, and sense of humor seldom found these days. This weblog is also well worth reading.

And, as soon as I am able to figure out the http coding which would enable me to do so, I plan on putting both of these weblogs on my list of favored links. Unfortunately, like most boggies, I am unable to understand any machinery more complex than a hand grenade or a garrote. Pity, that.